Terms and Conditions

Effective 8/17/2024

Welcome to Sassy Fortunes

By entering your digits and using our site, you’re agreeing to receive a steady stream of sarcastic, snarky, and occasionally savage text messages. If you’re easily offended, you might want to hit the back button—like, now.

Age Check

By using this site or signing up, you confirm you’re 18 years old or older. If you’re not, take your underage ass somewhere else—this isn’t the playground.

Your Consent

You’re giving us the green light to text you. No complaints about "Who’s this?" or "Why are you texting me?" You asked for it, remember?

Content Ownership

All content and materials available on the services including but not limited to text, graphics, logos, icons, images, audio clips, video clips, and software—are our property or that of our licensors and are protected by copyright, trademark, and other intellectual property laws. Don’t even think about using, reproducing, distributing, or creating derivative works from our content without our written permission. That’s stealing, and we don’t take kindly to thieves.

Privacy? We Got You

Your digits are safe with us. We promise not to sell your number to sketchy telemarketers or that weird guy from the corner store. Your phone might get a little sassier, but your info stays secure. For details, check out our Privacy Policy on our website.

No Whining

By signing up, you agree not to whine about the content. If a fortune hits too close to home, well, maybe it was meant to be. Tough love, bitch.

Law and Order

You agree to use the Services only for lawful purposes. No illegal shit, no restricting others’ enjoyment, and definitely no impersonating us, our employees, or anyone else. Violate these rules, and you’ll wish you hadn’t.

Liability? Not Our Problem

To the fullest extent permitted by law, Sassy Fortunes and its affiliates, officers, directors, employees, agents, and licensors are not responsible for any indirect, incidental, special, consequential, or punitive damages—including but not limited to loss of profits, data, use, goodwill, or other intangible losses—resulting from:

The Services are provided "as-is" and "as available." We make no promises about them being uninterrupted, error-free, or secure. In short, use at your own risk, bitch.

Unsubscribe? If You Must

If you ever decide you’re too fragile for our brand of snark, you can bail out anytime. Just text us the word "STOP" (no need to cry, we won’t take it personally). But let’s be real, why would you want to leave the fun?

Modification of Terms

We reserve the right to modify these Terms at any time. Any changes will be effective immediately upon posting the revised Terms on our website. Your continued use of the Services following the posting of changes constitutes your acceptance of such changes. So, stay tuned and don’t act surprised if things shift.

Indemnity

You agree to indemnify, defend, and hold harmless Sassy Fortunes and its affiliates, officers, directors, employees, agents, and licensors from and against any claims, liabilities, damages, judgments, awards, losses, costs, expenses, or fees (including reasonable attorneys' fees) arising out of or relating to your violation of these Terms or your use of the Services.

Karma’s a Bitch

By using our Services, you acknowledge that you’ve read, understood, and agree to be bound by these Terms. Play nice and don’t test the limits. Violate these terms, and you might find yourself under the spell of bad JuJu. Our JuJu Orb doesn't mess around—so tread carefully!